Addicting Moods

so today was a bit of an intense day. I finished Lolita and watched both There Will Be Blood and Atonement.

I hated Lolita until the final third of the book. And then it got brilliant. Perhaps, dragging the reader through the first two thirds set the final third up to be fantastic. I have a sneaking suspicion it had something to do with it. There will be blood was lifeless for me. An uninteresting story, with a lukewarm ending about a topic with infinitely more powerful stories (based on as much truth) at least I would think so. I was unmoved. And Atonement did move me. It moved me the whole way through. While stylistically I disagreed with the ending, the statements made by the elderly Briony are so controversial, I liked it simply for the fact that not only was I moved all the way to the end, it finished up in a way that pushed it further along as well. Which, I suppose with a topic like Atonement it'd be pretty damn hard to mess up.

The soundtrack however, reinforced my all too aware lack of knowledge in classical music. I loved the music, I love forlorn piano, I love whining violin and yet, I'm utterly blind stumbling through the literally massive tradition of classical music. A stumbling fool. My things-to-know list grows so damn quickly that I don't know how I'll ever make a dent.

I'll have to do a more settled in response to both Nabokov and McEwan when I have thought about it more, have more energy and aren't snagged in melancholy.

I'm sitting here on the sofa, in a silent house, with the soundtrack playing softly from my very dimly lit computer screen. Two things, would complete this scene, in completely different ways. I need either a sleeping lover/companion next to me on the sofa or, a cup of tea gone cold, a cup mind you, with the tea bag sitting soggy at the bottom, without enough tea left to immerse it and the dregs strong. Cold tea and classical piano.

i haven't heard any more news regarding jobs and I haven't seen my father for 9 months. I have commitments I'm only halfheartedly committed to. and I can't stop thinking about the smell of eucalyptus.