Strawberry Fields Forever: A Reprise.

So I picked strawberries again. It's a bit of a different set up, different strawberry varieties (who knew) and took some adjusting. Also, I'm having a hard time getting out of vacation mode and back into WWOOFing mode. Something about going home makes me want to just, wah wah, waste my time moaning and groaning in a hostel somewhere. I am having troubles getting into work. I don't like having to do things and I think it's particularly bad simply because I have something like a plane ticket home to say, ahhhh I just want to go home, ahhhh I just want to leave. Which, before, was never really an issue because well, duh, I had just gotten here. So that's difficult. But the large festival they are going to this weekend, at which they'll sell their strawberries with ice cream, I will be left behind, tending the farm and the house. Which, actually. Will be fantastic. I really would like to go to the festival and I think it'd be so fun and cool and yadda yadda, but I think some time alone would also be really great. I guess, because then I can act how I feel, mopey and dumb. Anyway. yeah. It's been interesting to discover both through Ireland and here, how much of a social person I am. When taking those personality tests I was always placed as somewhat of an introvert, mainly because the categorization is based off the question of whether you go into social situations to "recharge" or prefer to "recharge" on your own. Well I definitely recharge on my own. I don't recharge with other people. But uh, once I'm done charging the last thing I want is to be alone. A battery's purpose is not to recharge, derh. It's purpose is to be in a city and surrounded by tons of people and different people and shit going on and all that jazz. Parties, and talking, and humanity fer chrissakes. Then I can retreat when I get tired to my little personal space and recharge. Yep. I really crave sociality. And, well, socializing with strangers is just not cutting it anymore. I want my friends, my family the people I care about, the people that I CHOOSE to be social with. Those people. I want them.

Besides griping about how much I want to come home, I don't think there's much else to discuss. I am about to tackle a book called "Eros, Agape and Philia: Readings in the Philosophy of Love" I wrote a paper (for which course?) about the difference between Eros and Agape. Eros being a Greek philosophical type of Love and Agape being the Christian conception of Divine Love. So yeah. Figured it'd make good reading material. I am lamenting both my physical and mental out of shapeness. I need to read and write and think critically again and I need to get back to my running. Traveling was a wonderful hiatus a wonderful newness and a good break to sort of delineate my collegiate and post-collegiate life. I now have a definitive enough break in my life where I do feel like I'll start anew when I return home. I am not sure I would have moved on, or felt like I was starting something new had I go on to whatever right after graduation. I'm glad I've placed this gap. But, looking at the end of the gap, I can see that much of what I thought about myself, what I want, what I like, is still very much the same. Which, I suppose is a good thing. I've known from the beginning that I had no "reason" to go on this oversea adventure. No craving desire to escape, to experience something new, to really do anything of the sort. I was quite content with where I was and how things were when I graduated and so my eagerness to return is like awaiting something you had but suddenly got put on hold for 7 months. ya know? maybe Wow, tangent, I tried to tell you about a book I was going to read and flew right back to wanting to come home. Can you tell what's on my mind? Yeah, it's getting kind of intense.

My hosts here are vegetarians, and they cook really good veggie meals. Did I mention this already? Ok. Well, today I picked strawberries and then washed plastic tubs, and other various festival going ice cream/strawberry holding producing, selling items. And now, my host is cooking me dinner. Hee. Stir-fry. Yum. Is there anything else to say?

Oh, and all you nosey nosey gossip romance novel reading fools, this is NOT a gushy mushy flowery dowry lovetale. This is a blog, in fact, it's the blog of a very anti-gushy mushy flowery dowry lovetale person. So tough cookies. You can ask me personally. But blogosphere? Check no. Done and Done. Later people.